The Floor Police: Generation Next

Everyone who knows me and my family knows that I am a chip off of my Mom's block. I look like her. I laugh like her. I am emotional and sensitive like her. I am sure that I have some of my Dad's traits as well, but really, Older Sis got most of his strongest characteristics like the sarcasm, flowing sense of humor, and even his ears. In case you are wondering, Little Sis got a good mixture of both, plus the milk man's blond hair.

But, I am developing one of my Dad's traits at a point in my life where I almost cannot handle it. I have become the Floor Police.

You see, my Dad cannot go a day without cleaning the floor. On Whitehaven, he vacuumed and swept compulsively. Sometimes he'd ask us to vacuum, and because we complained so much about the weight of my parents' 1976 Kirby, he bought some lighter, crappier sucking machine. He's a little bit better now, as their new home has dirt colored tile and keeping flooring spotless in the country is just not possible. I am not sure who named Dad the Floor Police, but it fit, and stuck.

Speaking of Kirbys, I also own one. If you are not familiar with Kirbys, they are amazing vacuum cleaners that can generally only be purchased from a door-to-door salesperson. I bought mine after about my third glass of wine. I blame the entire incident on KP, as he was lured by the cute girl who scouted for anyone who would let her "clean their carpet for free." She then did the ole switch a roo, and some guy came in to show me the awesomeness that is a Kirby. I paid $40 a month for the thing, during a time in my life when $40 was a whole lot of money. But hey, I didn't have mine repossessed, like a dear friend of mine who simply never paid for hers. It's actually a very funny story, for another time.

Unfortunately, my Kirby is shorting out. If I hold it upright, it works great, but it's sort of difficult to vacuum with the handle straight up. It needs to go in...next week.

Now, nearly 6 months pregnant and with a vacuum cleaner on the fritz, I have become the next generation of Floor Police.

I am so crazy, I am already thinking of how many people will be in my house when Rad's born and how on earth I will keep the floors clean. Today, I swept the entire house, after doing yard work, even with a very tired back. Why did I have to become even crazier now?

In the future, I foresee many shiny floored days. And driving Rad crazy. I can already imagine that I am going to have to buy him some lighter, crappier vacuum in 2020. Thanks Dad.